T_T ...好失败

Today was my road test. I had a lesson before I took the test and during the lesson, I felt that I would do bad on the parking since it wasn't really my forte. So the inspector came, but I was calm cuz looking nervous is a big no-no. I felt confident during the entire test, except the parking cuz I bumped on the curb...like really hard but I did do a fix for it...i think. But anyways, when the test ended, she told me "You need to work more on your steering and parking, and then you can retake the test." And I said, "Retake the test?". "Yes", she said. and my heart just sank T_T

the other girl taking the test after me passed ::sigh:: hurray for her. I looked at my road test results and saw that I had 60 points taken off when 30 pts was the max to pass. I got points taken off for poor judgment approaching or at intersections, turning too widely for both left and right, failure to adequately observe/use caution, excessive maneuvers in parking, poor engine control/acceleration, and poor steering control. I can understand the parking part, but I had no idea I was doing so badly on the other parts. I really thought I did a good job. It just came as a complete shock. The entire trip back to the auto school was depressing. I'm not even sure if I want to continue going back to that school, but I had so much lessons on that car, I don't really have a choice after scaring my cousin away from helping me anymore. I guess I'm just going to have to take another lesson or two, and retake the road test. But I'm not sure about the road test location though.

So I FAILED. I was really hoping to pass on my first try.


Later that day, I joined my lil sis for yoga. She's been going to a place in St. Mark's known as Yoga to the People. They provide free sessions for 1 hr every day of the week. I bought my $20 mat from BB&B or else I had to rent a mat for $2 from the place. It was located right next to a korean resto that I had gone to before (and which I nvr noticed the yoga place before).

We were buzzed thru the door and walked several flights of stairs up, and there was a musty-like smell. We took off our shoes before walking into the studio and I thought there were a lot of ppl there already. But my lil sis told me that today actually had a lot less ppl b/c there were times when the mats were only an inch apart from the neighbors while there was almost 6 inches of space today. She thinks it's cuz the ppl rather enjoy the nice weather we got today. But it's still good to arrive 10-15 mins early since they close the door at the dot. The lights were a bit on the amber side and it was stuffy. It didn't help either that it reached like 70 degrees outside. The windows were closed shut when I wanted them open, but my lil sis said the hotter it is, the better cuz the heat promoted sweating better. But this place was stuffy like a sauna, and I was breaking a sweat even before I sat down on my new lite blue mat. I laid down my mat next to my lil sis and started stretching a lil bit and chit-chatting with my lil sis's friend who was also there as well.  I noticed that there were a lot of girls, but some guys as well, and 95% of the attendees were like betw 20-30 yrs old since this is near NYU.

So the session began at 6pm. I didn't know what to expect except to sweat a lot, and boy did I sweat loads. Holding the poses was the hardest part and that made me sweat the most. I took yoga in HS and nvr had such a workout as I did here. My palms became sweaty and sweat was just sliding down the side of my face and meeting at my chin as droplets, but it felt GOOD. I heard other ppl making hisses, aahhs, and other noises as they breathed. It felt GREAT cuz I was having a crappy day from my failed road test and I was channeling all my energy to not let the setback affect me, and it worked.

The instructor would walk around and give out directions, but I mostly tried to follow my lil sis since I wasn't familiar with all the poses' names. And there was a female TA there to help out as well. Near the end, the lights got dimmer and I can tell that we were doing poses that were meant to cool us off cuz I didn't even need my towel to wipe myself, but I will next time cuz I see a pimple developing on my forehead as I am typing this.

At the final stage, the light was turned off except for the natural light from the sunset, and we lay down listening to this Tibetan Singing Bowl. Of course she was playing it from her ipod but this was a special sort of meditation music. It sounded like something striking a metal bowl and then using the striker to run around the rim of the bowl. This made a strange effect to my ears and mind, almost as if it was trying to buzz out my thoughts b/c it was really loud, but at the same time, relaxing. It kinda sounded like what the Tibetan monks would play with that swiveling thing they usually carry around in the movies. It made me feel like I was floating. [My lil sis would later tell me after the session that she was distracted by some girl next to her who had gotten up during the Tibetan singing bowl part to go the bathroom, and the bathroom door had slammed behind her as well. She later overheard the instructor telling the girl to go to the bathroom after the session is over since she disturbed the music vibrations. I, on the other hand, didn't hear any of this lols cuz I was that concentrated on the music.]

After the buzzing faded, I remained in my position for a lil while longer before getting up to change. There was no more sweat on me, but my pony tail felt a lil sticky. As I left, it felt a lil bit awkward with the instructor at the door with her box of donations. But she greeted everybody out and I said thank yous and that was it. And I am sooooo coming back here again.

nervious

So my road test is this friday in Red Hook, Brooklyn and I am as nervous as wreck just typing  this >.<
I still need to work on my turns and tunnel vision =_=

And I have recently become obsessed with the Aromatherapy hand cream line from Bath & Body Works! I apply a lot of lotion/cream on since I have dry skin and I have been using Cetaphil since I was diagnosed with eczema, so I've always stayed away from skin care that had any smell/fragrance to it since it's usually the chemicals behind the scent that can irritate my skin. But when my lil sis bought these beautifully aromatic scented hand cream, I had to try them..just a lil dab and I was in love! and thank fully i've had no allergic rxn to them..yet xD

"Sleep Well. Lavender Essential Oil soothes and calms so you can sleep better. Chamomile Essential Oil has a lulling effect to enhance sleep."

 
This is the Sleep hand cream and I absolutely LOVE LOVE this scent! I think anything with lavender has that soothing-lulling effect, but I never believed it until I tried this. I sleep like a baby with this on before I hit the bed. I'm thinking about getting the Pillow Mist to spray on my pillow cuz I want to keep smelling it as I dream 8D ..or drool

 "Think clearly. Eucalyptus Essential Oil clears the mind to improve concentration. Spearmint Essential Oil is uplifting and helps the mind to focus."

This is the Stress Relief hand cream. I like putting this on during the day and smelling it before I head out kinda does clear out my head. I applied a lot of during my GRE exam, and I'm not saying it didn't stop me from perspiring cold sweat, but at least it kept my head together. I'm sniffing it as I type too. I think I'm going to bring this with me to the road test too, if i remember..

"Boost your energy. Orange Essential Oil refreshes and uplifts to relieve tension. Ginger Essential Oil stimulates the soul and sharpens the senses."

This is the Energy hand cream. I don't get to use this one often enough since my lil sis carries it around with her all the time. I don't feel a difference in energy level after I use it, but the scent has a good balance to it for those who like orange/ginger scents. It's not too citrusy and the ginger is not too strong either.





Each category actually has two scents so there's Lavender Vanilla for sleep, Tranquil Mint for stress relief, and Mandarin lime for energy. I'm thinking about visiting a store sometime in the future to smell those out. The only category that my lil sis didn't get was for Sensuality and this has scents in Black Currant Vanilla and Jasmine Vanilla. From the online reviews, these are more on the sweet smelling side.

These sold for $10 each, but they have sales like buy 2, get 1 free those kinda things. These also come in pillow mist spray, body lotion, body mist, massage oil, body wash, hand soap, sudsing scrub, shampoo & conditioner, bath salts, and prolly more forms. I really like their packaging and the colors. I'm starting to think it's their marketing labels that's buying me out b/c every time I read the labels, i want to just keep applying them on me.

Overall, the aromatherapy line does not guarantee all the things that is written on the label, BUT for me, it def works in calming my nerves down and helping me sleep better...making me feel more of a happy and chirpy person =D

P.S.

I (think) I want to go to grad school now. But I need to write my personal statement. I have been trying to gather info for it about a week already, but I seem to be lacking in inspiration. What story am I going to tell? I just keep staring at my blinking cursor... I will post up a draft of it here when I complete my 1st draft.

FIGHTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE: I finally finished the 1st draft of my PS! I've sent to my career center since they proof-read PS's before sending it to my professor to read.

 1^ST Draft: 03/11 – 03/15/2011

I am applying for the PhD program in Chemical Engineering and how I came to that decision all began while I was still attending Brooklyn Technical High School. I was given a homework assignment to summarize newspaper articles, and since I already had an interest in the sciences, I went straight to the Science section of the New York Times. I was browsing through the pages when I came across an article entitled “Not Science Fiction: An Elevator to Space.” I was immediately drawn to it as I wondered as to how the author was going to convince me that a space elevator was not an artisan’s fantasy.

As I continued to read further, it became more difficult to contain my excitement at all the possibilities that would abound from this project development. Although the space elevator is still in its conceptual phase, it already holds many promising advantages including easier access to space, lowered costs in launching spacecrafts, commercial exploitation, and others, in which, all makes way for more enabling technologies. In fact, the logistics of the building plan are already underway; however, the current technology is still not up to par with the visionary’s standards.

The space elevator construction has come to represent an enormous engineering feat. One of the most problematic features is the cable material. The material requirements called for something that is light-weight and yet, strong enough to support several tons. Neither steel nor any other material at the time offered a viable solution, until the spur in nanotube research in the 1990s. Carbon nanotube is an active area of study due to its many attractive properties and potential capabilities in mechanical and electronic applications. However, the longest nanotube created thus far has only been a few centimeters long, and hence, more research work is necessary. Overcoming this obstacle and others to come is what I envisioned myself in partaking.

In college, I selected my major in chemistry because I wanted to understand the underlying science and theories that could potentially be applied in material research. In addition, the chemistry curriculum incorporated a rigorous amount of chemistry, physics, and math courses that would be practical for my studies since material science is a special field of the multinterdisciplinary nature. I was also interested in doing research in carbon nanotubes and other related nanosciences since there is still so much to learn from them before they can be applied on a grander scale. At the Stony Brook University, I participated in a short-term project under Dr. Katarzyna Sawicka, where my lab group analyzed nanofibers generated from the electrospinning technique. After I transferred to the City College of New York to complete my undergraduate studies, I joined Dr. Zhonghua Yu’s laboratory, where Raman spectroscopy was being used to study the electronic properties of carbon nanotubes. I learned to operate Raman spectroscopy-related instruments to collect images and spectra, compile the data into graphs using ORIGIN software, and analyze the data displayed. In addition to developing my lab skills, I delved into almost every aspect of the research process – conducting literature searches, recording data into log books, following lab protocol, writing lab reports in an academic journal fashion, attending departmental seminars, presenting a PowerPoint media on my work, and editing draft versions of article submittals. My contributions to this research have already been published in the Journal of Physical Chemistry and Carbon, and one article to be published in the Annual of City College Exemplary Science Students Research.

When I graduated from the City College of New York with a B.S. degree and awarded with the Ward Medal & J. Birnbaum Scholarship in Chemistry, I was hesitant to admit immediately into graduate school. My initial intention was to enter the private industry before obtaining a higher degree. Unfortunately, for the past year I have been unsuccessful in this endeavor and only found success in jobs unrelated to my career interests. After several interview setbacks, I eventually came to realize that I needed more experience and specialized knowledge, of which I can only obtain from graduate school. After reviewing the list of courses offered at the Grove School of Engineering, I immediately knew that I wanted to apply for the PhD program in the Department of Chemical Engineering. By attending courses such as advanced materials engineering, polymer science, and nanotechnology, I felt confident that the work done there would equip me with the skills and knowledge that I need in making the most effective contribution to the field. 

I am also particularly attracted to one of the research areas undertaken by the chemical engineering department, which is nanomaterials and self assembly. Dr. Alexander Couzis and his research group are engaged in multiple research ventures and I am primarily interested in their molecular engineering project involving chemically functionalized nanoisland surfaces. This project would allow me to make the best use of my education as this research requires an in-depth chemical science understanding at the molecular level as well as applying the appropriate engineering techniques in acquiring the desired functionalities. In addition, I would be able to learn more about the process of self-assembly since I have yet to gain exposure to this interesting phenomenology. In the mechanical engineering department, I am also intrigued by the work done by Dr. Jackie J. Li and her lab. Since I had previously studied the characterization of single-walled carbon nanotubes in my undergraduate research, I can now extend further in Dr. Li’s experimental investigations of the mechanical and electrical properties of carbon nanotubes and other nanocomposites. In addition, I wish to apply the molecular mechanics based approach that she had developed for evaluating the elastic properties of both single- and multi-walled carbon nanotubes since this study makes a significant impact in fabricating nanomaterials for mechanical purposes.

I want to thank my undergraduate research mentor, Dr. Yu, for providing me the opportunity to engage in hands-on work in nanoscience research and develop lab skills that are essential to my intellectual pursuits. This experience showed me that the field of nanotechnology is broad and broader still in the areas that remain undiscovered or unascertained. At the City College of New York, by including an engineering perspective alongside my background in chemistry, I can make a larger step forward in expanding the current knowledge base in nanotechnology and developing novel nanomaterials that can become potentially applicable for building the space elevator or other commercial enterprises.